Don't Deny Me Page 10

  “Earth to Alice.” Jay sounded annoyed. “Hello!”

  Alice gave him an apologetic smile. “I don’t know. First times should be special, you know?”

  “I’ve known you for a long time. It would not be your first time.”

  “You know what I mean,” Alice told him. “The first time for us. I’m not sure I want to do it in Bernie’s guest bedroom with everyone around. It should be … you know. Special. What?”

  Jay had given her such a stunned look, Alice was confused.

  “Oh. My. God,” he said. “You are totally fucked, Alice. You know that, right? Utterly and completely fucked.”

  “Why?” she cried, heart and stomach both twisting.

  “You’re in love with Mick!”

  “No.” Alice shook her head firmly. “No way. It’s too soon for that.”

  “Soon or not,” Jay said, “you’d better put on your crash gear, baby, because if you aren’t yet, you’re about to fall for that guy. Super hard.”

  * * *

  “Mick! Welcome.” Cookie, Bernie’s wife, beamed and gestured for him to come inside. “We’re so glad you could join us.”

  He kissed her cheek and handed her the basket of breads and cheeses he’d picked up on the way from one of the farmers’ markets. Normally shopping in a place like that gave Mick hives, but somehow a case of light beer and some tortilla chips just didn’t seem like the right thing to bring to this kind of party. How he’d even managed to become a part of this crowd, he had no idea, but he was glad he had, because of Alice.

  “Jay and Alice are driving together and they’re on their way. Paul called to say he’d be here in a half hour. Dayna is coming, too. You haven’t met her yet. She’s a friend of mine from work. Tanya unfortunately won’t make it, she’s actually moved to Ohio to take a new job. But that makes room for new friends!” Cookie peeked into the basket and made a sound of appreciation. “Oh, this looks wonderful. You didn’t have to, Mick.”

  “Of course I did. My mom told me never to go to a party without taking something for the hostess.” Mick followed her inside and carefully closed the door behind him, then waited for an awkward second. “So … should I put …”

  Cookie, halfway up the stairs to the living room, turned. “Oh! Do you mind the rumpus room bedroom? You had it last time, and I know some people don’t care for it, but—”

  “No, that’s great, actually.” Mick looked toward the stairs to the lower level. “Let the wild rumpus start, right?”

  Cookie laughed. “Get settled, and then come upstairs. I’m going to slice this bread and we can have wine. You drink wine, don’t you, Mick?”

  “I’ll drink whatever you have,” he told her honestly, and took his things into the small basement room he’d used the last time. He tossed his bag on the bed, thinking he’d unpack it later, if at all, but for a second he sat. Testing the mattress. Thinking about Alice and if this was where they’d finally make good on all those subtle promises they’d been making to each other over the past couple of months.

  The thought stirred him up, so he forced himself to stand. In the small attached bathroom, Mick splashed his face with cool water. For good measure, he brushed his teeth. They hadn’t talked about how they were going to handle sharing what they’d been up to with the rest of the weekend crowd, but he was sure that if he had the chance to kiss Alice, he was going to take it.

  Upstairs in the kitchen, Mick took a glass of wine and plate of bread, cheese, and mustard, along with some small sausages Cookie had cut. Bernie offered him a cigar, too. Mick wasn’t much of a smoker, but when in Rome, he supposed.

  “Living like kings,” Bernie said.

  “And queens,” Cookie added archly. “But smoke outside.”

  On the deck, Mick tried not to pace or act antsy, though as forty minutes and then almost an hour passed without Alice’s arrival, he was starting to go a little nuts. Paul showed up laden with bottles of wine with labels the names of which Mick couldn’t even pronounce.

  “How’s it going?” Paul leaned against the railing, a glass of wine in his hand. He held out his hand for Mick’s cigar.

  After a second, Mick gave it to him. He watched the other man take a long puff and then look over the cigar with an assessing eye. He waved it away when Paul offered to hand it back, though. “You keep it.”

  “Not into cigars?”

  Not into sharing them with other dudes he barely knew, Mick thought, but shrugged an answer, instead. He sipped his wine and listened for the sound of tires crunching on the gravel. The French doors opened behind them, and he was already turning at the sound of a new female voice, but it wasn’t Alice. A pretty blonde in a flowy sundress stood there.

  “Hi. I’m Dayna. Cookie sent me out here to meet you … Mick?” She pointed at him. “And Paul?”

  Paul straightened. “Well, hey, now. Hi.”

  Dayna laughed and shook her head, her blond ponytail swinging. She stepped carefully out onto the deck, her feet bare. She’d painted her toenails red, Mick noticed. Everything about her seemed designed to make a man notice.

  She shook Paul’s hand, then turned to Mick. “Hi.”

  He shook it, but didn’t let their hands linger too long against each other. Dayna wasn’t used to men who didn’t linger. Mick saw that at once in the slightly confused look she gave him, but her expression turned knowing in the next second when the doors opened again. She turned to follow Mick with her gaze, but everything about his concentration had turned to Alice.

  “Hi,” Alice said with a small wave.

  And though he’d imagined himself sweeping her into his arms and kissing her breathless, in the moment, Mick found himself paralyzed by her obvious hesitation. She hadn’t been that way with him the times they’d met up over the past few weeks, so seeing her cut her gaze first to Paul and then Dayna and finally Jay, who’d come onto the deck after her, Mick didn’t move. Alice had taken a step or two toward him, but suddenly everyone was there on the deck, all of them shaking hands or hugging or being introduced, and the chance to kiss her had been lost.

  * * *

  So much for bothering with the lacy panties, Alice thought as she unpacked her bag into the dresser and hung up the dresses Jay had rolled for her in the closet. She and Mick had barely said more than a few words to each other, much less had any chance for him to get a glance at what she wore beneath her dress. Despite what she’d told Jay, she had been half hoping tonight would be the night they finally got down to it.

  “Oh, well,” she muttered. “Tomorrow is another day.”

  “Gone with the Wind?”

  Alice turned at the sound of Dayna’s voice. The other woman stood in the doorway to the bathroom between the rooms each of them was using. Alice laughed. “Something like that.”

  Dayna smiled. “So, I’m going to take a quick shower. Unless you need to get in here, first?”

  “Nope, I’m good.” Alice stretched a little and eyed the bed. She wasn’t even close to tired, and considering it was nearly two in the morning, that was saying something.

  When Dayna closed the bathroom door and the water started running, Alice quietly closed her dresser drawer. She paced for a moment or so. It didn’t seem likely that Dayna would try to come into Alice’s bedroom again, but just in case, Alice locked the door from her bedroom into the shared bath. She turned off her light. She slipped into the hall, listening for any sounds of other wakeful weekenders, but there was nothing but the soft bubble from Bernie’s fish tank in the living room. With her heart thumping so loud she’d have been incapable of hearing anything else anyway, Alice closed the door behind her and tiptoed into the living room.

  Someone had left a light on in the kitchen, and she prepared to make an excuse about needing a drink of water, but the words died before they ever escaped her lips at the sight of Mick standing at the counter. He turned when she came in. She didn’t imagine the light in his eyes at the sight of her.

  And then he was moving across the r
oom toward her, that light turned to a look of determination. She was in his arms before she knew it. His mouth on hers. Backed up against the edge of the counter, Alice let out a muffled meep of surprise that became a sigh when Mick’s tongue swept inside her mouth. Her arms went around his neck, pulling him closer.

  “Hi,” Mick whispered into her mouth. “I wanted to do this all night.”

  Alice shifted so the counter wasn’t digging into her, but didn’t let him pull away. “Why didn’t you?”

  “Wasn’t sure you wanted me to.”

  “And now?” Smiling against his lips, Alice nudged a knee between his legs.

  Mick groaned a little and slid his hands to grip her hips. “I should’ve kissed you right away.”

  “Yeah, you should have,” she told him. “You always should.”

  Mick nipped at her chin, then nuzzled against her neck. He tipped her head back to get at her throat, sending shivers all through her. “You could’ve kissed me, you know.”

  Alice slapped at him playfully. “What, me? What kind of girl do you think I am?”

  “A super sexy one.” Mick’s tongue traced a pattern on her skin.

  Her nipples had gone hard at the first press of his teeth on her flesh, but at this gentle touch, they felt as though they could cut glass. Between her legs, heat pooled. The lace of her panties pressed her impertinently every time she moved—and she couldn’t bring herself to care, even though she could feel herself getting wet enough to soak them.

  She murmured his name. He laughed against her neck and pushed himself against her, then went still. They stayed that way for a long moment. Alice timed their breathing, in and out, until it synced. She didn’t want to move.

  Mick’s fingers squeezed her hips, then drifted a little lower to her thighs. Helplessly, Alice arched. She wanted his mouth on her neck again. His hands on every other place. And Mick obliged as though she’d spoken aloud, commanding him, though all she’d done was sigh. One of his hands went to the small of her back. The other inched up the hem of her dress.

  Alice shuddered. Her nails dug into his shoulders. When he nibbled again on her throat, her entire body jerked.

  She wanted him. Truth was, she’d wanted him since almost the first moment she’d seen him, even though he’d been sullen and grouchy at the time. The wanting, Alice knew from experience, often went away the longer she knew a guy. Little things like the sound of him chewing or how he answered the phone or his views on which way the toilet paper roll should be hung could destroy any semblance of lust. With Mick though, nothing had worn away the edges of her desire to make them soft. Instead, everything about him had honed the wanting to a razor’s edge, and it sliced her open now. Made her raw with hunger for him.

  The shuffle of feet behind him moved them apart from each other like they’d been attached to uncoiling springs. It would’ve been too late to hide what they’d been doing if Jay had been paying attention, but the look on his face said he was too wrapped up in his own drama to have noticed what he’d walked in on. He saw them, of course, and since he’d already talked with Alice about her and Mick he might easily have guessed, but clearly he wasn’t in the mood to care.

  “Hey,” Alice said, pushing Mick gently to the side. “What’s up? You okay?”

  “Didn’t feel good.” Jay went to the fridge and pulled out a pitcher of water. He filled a glass and drank it without looking at either one of them.

  Alice looked at Mick, who shrugged. She looked at Jay, whose shoulders had slumped. Friendship or fucking, she thought, wishing she and Mick had gone to his bedroom ten minutes ago. With a sigh, she squeezed Mick’s shoulder.

  “Want to talk about it?” she asked Jay.

  Mick took a step back from her, eyes on hers, mouth quirked on one side. “I’m going to head to bed. ’Night.”

  Jay turned as Mick left, so Alice didn’t watch him go. She looked at her friend, his face pale. Circles below his eyes.

  “You look like shit. Are you going to puke?”

  “No. Feel like it, though.” Jay lowered his voice and looked at the glass of water in his hand. He poured it down the sink and rinsed the glass, then put it in the drainer. His shoulders slumped again.

  Shit. He might actually be crying. Alice put her arm around his shoulders. “Talk to me, Jay. Is it Paul?”

  Jay nodded.

  Double shit, she thought, but waited for her friend to speak. He didn’t at first. They stood in the kitchen in silence, until finally he turned to face her.

  “He’s not going to ask me to move in with him.” The words clearly stuck in his throat, but he forced them out. He even managed to give her a wobbly smile. “I’m not even sure he’s not going to break up with me at the end of the weekend. I think he’s just holding off because he’s here with me.”

  “Gross, Jay. Why would he do that?”

  “So he doesn’t make it awkward.” Jay grimaced. “Because Bernie’s my friend, not his.”

  Alice petted his shoulder. “It should be awkward for him, then. If he’s going to be a jerk.”

  “He’s kind of always a jerk,” Jay said with an embarrassed laugh. “That’s part of his charm.”

  Alice sighed and gave him another hug, but ended up laughing along with him. She squeezed him. “Is it worth me telling you to dump him?”

  “You’ve known me longer than that.” Jay leaned into her embrace. “But I don’t want to wait for him to break it off with me, either. The rest of my weekend is kind of ruined, anyway. Can we get out of here?”

  Alice hesitated. It was Saturday morning by this point, but she hadn’t planned on leaving until Sunday night. She’d been looking forward to another two days and one more night to spend with Mick.

  “Please,” Jay said.

  And, with a sigh, Alice agreed.

  * * *

  Mick waited until lunch time to ask Bernie where Alice was. He thought maybe she’d slept in, or gone off to town with Cookie. Something, anything other than that she’d up and lit out without bothering to tell him she was going. But when noon ticked around and still no Alice appeared, he had to know.

  “Jay wasn’t feeling well, so she took him home.” Bernie offered a bottle of beer, but Mick shook his head. “She left me and Cookie a note. Sorry, I should’ve mentioned it earlier.”

  “Nothing serious, I hope.” Dayna had a platter of deli meat and cheese in both hands. She’d been on the way to putting it on the dining room table, but paused at Bernie’s explanation.

  Paul, who’d been setting the table with flatware, put in, “He had a case of the vapors.”

  Dayna laughed. Mick didn’t. Bernie smiled briefly, but without much humor. Cookie came out of the pantry with some bags of chips, and lunch carried on without more on the subject. If Paul felt the loss of his boyfriend at the table, he didn’t show it. He spent his time charming Dayna and Cookie with stories about his world travels. They didn’t talk about Jay at all, nor about Alice.

  She hadn’t left Mick a note explaining her late-night escape. She hadn’t left him a message, either, though the cell service out here was spotty enough that even if she had, he wouldn’t get it until he was closer to home. He checked his phone anyway, dialing in to his voicemail just in case there was something there. Nothing.

  And nothing all day, though he tried not to think about it too much. Still, he felt her absence too keenly to ignore it. At the lake, during dinner, the games they played after. He thumbed a text or two to her, but suspected they didn’t reach her. Either that, or she wasn’t answering him, and the thought of that was worse than the fact she’d ducked out without telling him.

  Sunday morning, Mick made his excuses about wanting to avoid traffic and a heavy workweek ahead, and got on the road by 9:00 A.M. Bernie’s place was two and a half hours from his place, but only an hour and a half or so from Alice’s. He’d never been to her house, but she’d sent him a funny card in the mail a week or so ago. They’d been doing that, sending each other notes and cards. He
’d had flowers delivered to her, too. He remembered the address.

  It wasn’t until he was pulling into her driveway that it occurred to him he should have called first, in case she were still in bed. Or not home. Or had snuck out of Bernie’s house without telling him because she never wanted to see him again. But it was too late, he’d been impulsive and now here he was. He had two choices—get out of the car and knock on her door and tell her there was no way he could last another day without being inside her. Or, he could be responsible and respectable and not a creepy stalker sex freak and go home.

  Mick got out of the car.

  * * *

  Alice had been up since dawn, too wired and anxious to sleep any longer. She and Jay hadn’t gotten home until six yesterday morning, and she’d managed to keep herself awake all day so she didn’t throw off her sleep schedule … well, sort of. She’d been a zombie all day long, mustering little more energy than it took to watch old movies and read before she crashed at just past 7:00 P.M.

  She’d slept hard, but fitfully. She’d dreamed of Mick. His hands, teeth, tongue, lips. His cock, hard against her. She’d woken in a sweat, the covers tangled, her body singing from the dream but aching from the lack of release.

  He hadn’t called her.

  She had left in a rush at Jay’s insistence, but she’d made sure to leave a note for Bernie. Surely Mick would’ve asked why she’d left. He might even have worried, a little. Jay was his friend, too. If he were really worried, wouldn’t he have at least called once?

  She hadn’t been shy about calling or even texting him occasionally in the past few weeks, but for some reason her fingers now refused to punch in his number. She didn’t want to interrupt him having fun, she told herself, but the real reason was more complicated than that. Stupid head, she thought now with a jaw-cracking yawn. Making trouble for the body.